So, I've found the idea of my girlfriend fucking other people enormously exciting for some time now. Moreover, my girlfriend actually has already fucked other people because, with my permission, she had a foursome last year with two other girls and a guy (I wasn't there. I should also add that I was a little bit jealous when she had the foursome, but mostly I was just really turned on, and when she got back the next morning we had obscenely good sex).
Alright, well, we were drunk last night at my friend's house, and we were talking about bisexuality. Now, at one point, our friend went to the bathroom, leaving me and my girlfriend alone. As we were sitting there, my girlfriend quickly told me that she thinks she's bisexual. Moreover, she told me that there's a girl at her university who she's attracted to, and that she wants to talk to this girl. We had to terminate the discussion there, for the time being, because our friend came back.
Later on, as we were walking home, drunk, we started talking about the topic again. My girlfriend told me that she felt guilty, firstly for having told me her thoughts, and secondly for having such thoughts. I was drunk, I wanted to assure her that she had no reason to feel guilty, I had been thinking about confessing my thoughts for some time, and in addition to this she had just taken the rather ballsy and honest step of telling me that she is bi.
So I told her that I once had an intensely erotic dream in which she was sleeping with other people, that I was deeply aroused rather than jealous when she had her foursome last year, that I trust her too much to feel insecure at the prospect of her sleeping with other people (within certain limits), and that she therefore ought not to feel guilty about her thoughts. Moreover, I basically suggested at one point that she could have sex with this girl if she wanted to (and if she was able to seduce her, of course).
Anyway, she wasn't really excited, she just said that she thought it was weird that I felt the way that I did. She told me that the reason she thinks it weird might be that a part of her assumes, and she admits that this is probably an unfair assumption on her part, that I am allowing her to sleep with other people as a preemptive justification for getting her to allow me to sleep with other people (for the sake of simplicity, I won't go into the details of the resulting discussion on this point unless I am asked, but I was able to very convincingly argue, or rather simply point out, that certain facts of which we are both aware mean that this couldn't possibly be my intention).
Another point she made was that she didn't want to sleep with anyone because it was cheating and because she thought that I would be hurt (this, for obvious reasons, is a very easy objection to get around). The last point she made was that she's confused as to why I would allow her to sleep with other people, or why it is that I'm okay with the idea of her sleeping with other people.
Well, whatever her reasons, good or bad, for the time being she's at the very least extremely hesitant about the idea of sleeping with other people, and again she considers it "weird," yet every time we finish one of our talks, we go to bed for "some reason" and she is soacking wet. Then she says I am weird again. It's not that we had an argument or something, far from it, and in any case we've only talked about it a few times.
All the same, why do women not jump at the idea of cuckolding their partners when they're given the green light? I mean, from what I hear, and from my experience last night, it really seems common for them to feel confused by it. Why is that?
Anyway, last night I was watching a movie that had a scene where 2 guys were with a girl in bed. It wasn't that explicit but she sat down to watch with me and didn't make a sound. I took a risk and started to rub her pussy and she opened her legs more and let me go inside. Again, soaking with a HUGE orgasm. But yet, she is still hesitant.
It's sort of amusing in its irony: most guys are worried about their partners cheating on them, and many often try and fail to ensure that their partners remain completely faithful to them; on the other hand, I would love for my girlfriend to sleep with someone if she's attracted to them, but I can't damn well get her to do it. Maybe I trust her so much precisely because of that part of her character that makes her reluctant to do it, which in turn makes me comfortable with the idea of her doing it.
Tomorrow I plan on talking about our sexual pasts. We did that once before where I asked her to pretend I was an ex and she came within 15 seconds of me saying that. I know she likes it and am sure of it. I'll just take it slow and enjoy the ride and hopefully we will get there. Thanks for hearing me out.
M & Z